Sunday, December 13, 2015

When Joy Is Your Enemy: A Deeper Look at Disney's Inside Out

I want to enter into an honest conversation with you. One day I was listening to a podcast which spoke about mental illness and the stereotypes that are often associated with it. For those who do not know, Anxiety and Depression are a part of my world. Throughout my whole life I have been holding hands with Anxiety, seeing it grow and change into various forms, so it was only obvious that along the way Depression would take my other hand. So often we shrug off mental illness, sweeping it under the rug, finding any way we can to avoid these uncomfortable conversations. I admit these are hard conversations. To talk about such things, regardless of the fact that you yourself, or someone extremely close to you, statistically, has battled these monsters, we just don't talk about it. If you are wondering what this has to do with the movie, maybe this picture can help bring light to what I am trying to say.

Sadness, throughout the whole movie, is made out to be useless to Joy. Joy even goes so far as to make sure Sadness stays in a circle for fear that her sadness would touch or ruin other things. Maybe this is supposed to be a comical bit, but instead this is the perfect example of how society treats depression (and other mental illnesses). When I saw this scene, pain entered my heart, and hope emerged that maybe others would see this and understand. Surely society, who loves Disney and its creations, will understand that Sadness is being oppressed just like the rest of us struggling with mental illness. "Stay in your circle over there while I go and have a joyous time without you bringing me down." This is what Joy is. This is what society is.
     Regrettably, I have found this to be even stronger in the Christian perspective. "Maybe you need to pray more." "Perhaps this is God's way of punishing you." "God has given you so many blessings, just stop thinking about all of the negativity in your life." In other words, we should quit touching their happy, Christ-devoted way of life with our struggles. Rarely have I heard a sermon on this topic, and if I have, it most likely ended in "just read this religious book to get you through this hard time."


     What people like Joy don't understand is that we cannot simply get a quick-fix to our problems. Joy pushes us to sweep things under a rug, to pretend we are fine just as Riley is told to do by her mother when Riley's father is having a hard time adjusting. Struggling with depression is an everyday challenge, and due to societal standards, we try to keep it in our personally-designed circle. We don't want to be shunned or made to feel guilty, but we do. Just as Sadness is compelled to touch memories, we, as fallen humans, cannot stop Sadness from touching bits of our lives. Sometimes what should be joyous is sad. This is why Sadness has to touch the memories. The chemistry in our brains do not allow Joy to be our sole-driver. Joy is the one we pretend is in charge. We make a happy face, holding Sadness in a chalk circle, while feeling hopeless and helpless.
     Silence is killing us all. Trying to restrain Sadness (Our fears, our depression, our dirty secret swept under the rug) has caused me no joy, but instead to feel so alone and isolated. I cannot speak for everyone, but I hope, with this conversation, others can be made to feel like what they are feeling, even if it is not joyous or good, is okay because we are sharing it with others. As Christians we are asked to share in one another's burdens, yet we dismiss mental illness with such haste it leaves carpet burns on the skin. By now I hope you understand. When you are hurting, or a loved one is struggling, in my experience, "quick fixes" are not beneficial. If I ask what I should do, then by all means give your advice, but if Sadness has its hold, and my body is wracked with fear, being told to do something I can't in that moment causes my good friends Anxiety and Depression to clench their hands around my wrists. I cannot move. I cannot breathe. I feel guilty.
     If you learn anything from Inside Out or my post I hope it is this: Do not make us feel guilty. Understand we cannot control out brain chemistry, just like we usually cannot control our circumstances. In order for you to even understand the smallest bit of what we are going though, Sadness has to be our spokesperson. Joy is a charade, and Sadness is our relator. In the end of the movie, it is only by admitting the hurt and pain that anyone is able to connect with Riley. This goes for us as well. So often, I have felt guilty and burdensome because I am not what society wants me to be. I'm a little broken. This does not mean that my worth is any less than any other person's. Jesus himself said He came for the sick and broken, so shouldn't we, as a society, try to do the same?
     Erase the circle.
     Do not be ashamed.
     Jesus does love you.
     There are so many days full of Joy ahead.
     It's okay to cry and be who you are.
     You are not a burden, you are alive.

He said:
“Blessed are the poor in spirit,
    for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.
Blessed are those who mourn,
    for they will be comforted.
Blessed are the meek,
    for they will inherit the earth.
Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness,
    for they will be filled.
Blessed are the merciful,
    for they will be shown mercy.
Blessed are the pure in heart,
    for they will see God.
Blessed are the peacemakers,
    for they will be called children of God.
10 Blessed are those who are persecuted because of righteousness,
    for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.

Mathew 5:3-10